Almost two years ago, I asked T to put away all of our sandals. We were notorious for throwing them off of our feet, and letting them lie wherever they landed! T thought it would be cute to line them up, and I snapped a photo of it. When I printed it, T absolutely loved this snapshot (as did we!). He asked us to enlarge it and we obliged. It has been hanging in our hallway ever since and he seems to be attracted to it more and more lately. I know I can recall the day he set the sandals up for the picture, so I am sure he recalls it as well. It brings back the memory of B wearing his sandals, even though he couldn’t walk yet! T has a tendency of asking the notorious, “Why did B have to …” question whenever he is finished looking at photos. So, the honest response always is, “Well, we don’t know why. But, ….” It upsets me even as I write this post. A conversation like this should not exist in a normal child’s world, but, it exists in my world, and I still consider us normal. Sometimes our conversations end in tears, other times laughter. Regardless, I think we shouldn’t be afraid of these types of discussions with children. He has learned it is okay to cry, be angry, or laugh about B. Emotions are a true part of one’s soul, and young ones should be encouraged to express them. So, do we stop looking at pictures of B because we are afraid of the hurt or questions that may follow? Absolutely not. Hardships are the opportunities for one to become courageous.
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